Here it is — a new year has come — 2022. Time to take a moment to look back.
This is my 7th Year-in-Review and as in the prior years, I’ll go by the alphabet. An approach you will not likely read about anywhere else on the amazing worldwide web. I’m not a rebel, that’s not my reason or excuse for stubbornly sticking with it. Going by the alphabet makes me go deep into the neurological pathways of my brain and scan my memory without resistance of any sort or kind. For most letters, more than one word comes to mind, then again for other letters it’s a real challenge finding a new word as the years pass by. I’m always pleased when the work is done. Don’t they say that everything worthwhile requires effort…I consider it my start off the year sport-meditation, where I let my monkey mind jump around and around until it is so worn out that it eases down into a peaceful quietness.
2021 from A to Z
Avondmarkt — Traditions are something to honor whenever one can. Going to the evening market in Sluis, a tiny village adjacent to my hometown, is one of those sacred mother-daughter things we aim to do every summer. The weather was lovely, the shopping was awesome, the food delicious, but best of all was the company…thanks mom, for being you.
I’m a strong woman because a strong woman raised me.
Backnang — Is not only a picturesque town about 30 kilometers from Stuttgart but also the hometown of WIRmachenDRUCK, the company that onboarded me past September. Yeah. After 3 years and 3 months of mini-retirement, I was delighted to take on this opportunity. Four months in, I’m fortunate and extremely happy to say I feel quite at home already. WIRmachenDRUCK is an ambitious company with great potential and I’m excited to be part of its future. My role involves optimizing processes and creating data streams that enable smarter and faster decision-making. On the one hand, it requires big picture thinking while on the other hand, I get to dive real deep into the nitty-gritty details. Many people tend to excel at one or the other. I truly enjoy the balancing act.
There are no extra pieces in the universe. Everyone is here because he or she has a place to fill, and every piece must fit itself into the big jigsaw puzzle. ― Deepak Chopra
Coffin — It’s hard to find the right words when losing someone dear. I tend to say though I did not lose my dad. He went on a journey, to a place where we could not follow him. At least not yet. We made him a coffin. It came by post as a so-called “Do it yourself” package. We poured every inch of our love into it. Everyone in its very own way. I went to pick up the toolset from my uncle, my brother put the coffin together, my sister, her family, and my daughter did most of the painting, there was a rainbow piano, waves, boats, hearts, birds and everyone painted their name on it. It became the most beautiful coffin I’ve ever seen. Full of vivid colours, life, and love and I am certain my dad would’ve been so proud to have been bedded into it.
After your death you will be what you were before your birth — Arthur Schopenhauer
Darkness — In every darkness there is light. A few months after the funeral we met again and together we carried my father’s ashes to the sea. The moon shone brightly as we placed the ashes in small paper boats lit with beeswax candles. We walked into the dark sea and placed the tiny boats onto the waves. None of us knew how exactly, and whether at all, this would work, but the universe was with us and those tiny little boats went miles into the sea. We watched them for a long time as they went their way, their tiny little lights slowly disappearing into the horizon. Wave by wave. Off you went, my dear papa and even so, you’ll always be with me.
Dying is a troublesome business: there is pain to be suffered, and it wrings one’s heart; but death is a splendid thing — a warfare accomplished, a beginning all over again, a triumph. — George Bernard Shaw
Edith Egar— I don’t recall where I read about Edith Egar but somehow her book “In der Hölle tanzen” found its way into my hands. The English title of the book is “The Choice - Even in hell, hope can flower” which in German has been adopted to “Dancing in hell — How I survived Auschwitz and found my freedom.” Years ago I read “Man’s search for meaning” by Viktor E. Frankl. I wasn’t surprised to learn their paths crossed. Fragments from her book will stay with me forever. I get physical reactions when I recap them to other people. Her stories went deep under my skin. In 2021 I did not read a whole lot. I planned to read 42 books and I merely read 21. That does not at all bother me though.
In the case of good books, the point is not to see how many of them you can get through, but rather how many can get through to you. ― Mortimer J. Adler
Förster & Kreuz— Besides reading books, there’s a handful of newsletters /blogs I read regularly. One of them is from Förster & Kreuz
There was this article about the “Storms in Life” that started off with a real-life story of the trees tipping over in the Biosphere 2 Experiment in Phoenix, Arizona. Constructed between 1987 and 1991, Biosphere 2 was originally meant to demonstrate the viability of closed ecological systems to support and maintain human life in outer space. Even though the project was considered a failure it brought various insights. For example, the trees inside Biosphere 2 grew more rapidly than they did outside of the dome, but due to the lack of storms and wind, they fell over before reaching maturation. … Without stress wood, a tree can grow quickly, but it cannot support itself fully. It cannot withstand normal wear and tear, and survive. It is so relatable to us humans. Here is a lovely blog post I found on the very same topic.
Temper us in fire, and we grow stronger. When we suffer, we survive. ― Cassandra Clare
Guarantee— Nothing in life is guaranteed. I’m taking nothing for granted. Sometimes love is hard work. Sometimes we need to look deep into our souls to know what’s the way forward. 2021 was such a year. Looking back I am proud of how we managed as a couple and as a family. They say love is give and take. In many ways, that’s an understatement. Sometimes love requires you to jump over your shadow. To start anew. Wholeheartedly. That’s not easy. But it is possible. I’m glad it is.
Long-term relationships, the ones that matter, are all about weathering the peaks and the valleys. — Nicholas Sparks
Hazel — We picked up Hazel last April, a scared little bundle, who had just arrived from an awfully long trip all the way from Romania. She was a bit smaller than we imagined, cuter than we could have hoped for, and she has enriched our lives every day since. When my phone prepared me a photo review of the year 90% of the pictures had a least one dog in it. Our new family member has brought lots of love into the house.
You can’t buy happiness, but you can rescue it.
Inflatable Sun — My sister-in-law is a great gift-giver and gift-wrapper. It has become more and more complicated to give a teenager a Christmas gift, they have so much already and the wishes they still have, are often too large to be a gift. My son is seventeen now. Time for his first vacation with friends. Four boys off to Spain this coming summer. So a little pocket money was accompanied by an inflatable sun. I am fond of such little treasures, like pre-mementos. In German there’s a saying: Vorfreude ist die schönste Freude.= The greatest pleasure lies in anticipation. Literally translated Vorfeude means Prejoy. Alain Botton writes about it in his book “How Proust Can Change Your Life”. About the fact that nowadays we want & get so much instantly, that we forget how rewarding anticipation can be.
“Well,” said Pooh, “what I like best,” and then he had to stop and think. Because although Eating Honey was a very good thing to do, there was a moment just before you began to eat it which was better than when you were, but he didn’t know what it was called. — A.A. Milne
Juntos— the Spanish word for together. We are in this together. This world, this life, this pandemic, this city, this neighbourhood, this family. There is a lot we need to figure out. There is a lot we don’t know. There is a lot we don’t agree on. And yet there is also so much common ground. We sometimes forget that in the light of all our differences.
And so we lift our gaze, not to what stands between us but what stands before us. We close the divide because we know to put our future first, we must first put our differences aside. We lay down our arms so we can reach out our arms to one another. — Amanda Gorman
Kazuo Ishiguro — An author I much appreciate. Last year I read “Klara and the Sun”. A novel about what it means to be human, about life and love through the eyes of an android. A beautiful read. There are numourous reviews and summaries of the book so I don’t feel the urge to write one here. Giving this book a place in my alphabet perhaps serves as a reminder of the beauty of gracefulness. Klara is kind, observing, loving but most of all she’s at ease with herself, with her choices, with her fate. Part of that must have to do with the fact that when she has a hunch or better an urge of something she must do, she doesn’t rest until she gets it done.
Courage is grace under pressure. — Ernest Hemingway
Loaf — There is bread, and then there is bread, and then there is Babka. In 2021, I started to bake a chocolate Babka every last Sunday of the month. My daughter seriously loves Babka and my son is more than fond of it as well. The three of us together eat one entire Babka Loaf as our brunch. My timing has sometimes been slightly off but nevertheless, this is something I‘d like to keep up. The idea, that if my kids think of their teenhood many years from now, they’d recall Babka, yeah, I’d fancy that. Perhaps that is just me projecting my own wishes and desires but even if that’s so, I see little harm in that.
Some foods are so comforting, so nourishing of body and soul, that to eat them is to be home again after a long journey. To eat such a meal is to remember that, though the world is full of knives and storms, the body is built for kindness. ― Eli Brown
Maja & Silas — Being a mom, seeing your babies become toddlers, then school kids, teenagers, and now, well, almost adults. From having them on your lap. to having to stretch your legs to put your head against their shoulders. Motherhood is a wild ride. It’s the thing in my life I’m most proud of. I don’t want to write anecdotes here, my kids wouldn’t appreciate that. But if they ever decide to read these reviews, perhaps not until I’m gone, they are reminded of just how much I love them.
There’s no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one. — Jill Churchill
No Wifi— Last year autumn my husband took me to a romantic hotel in the middle of nowhere. Just woods, a small sauna, magnificent food, and neither wifi nor 3G Network. He is absolutely not the kind of person to organize these sorts of things. The more thankful I was that he did.
One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn’t do. — Henry Ford
Oneself — Another year went by. I turned 46. Am I more myself now than I was before? I don’t believe in such a thing. One is always oneself. Who else could one be? And yet every year I feel I’ve grown a little. Aging is so often connected to becoming old. Yet we start aging the minute we are born. Being and becoming go hand in hand. Looking back includes thinking about where one stands. I might only be halfway my life’s journey. No-one knows. Some people like to live life as if they have only very little time left. A day, a year. Whatever timeframe they choose, they need to feel some urgency to make sense of what is most important to do. I don’t need that. I have plenty of urgency. Perhaps that is why I live well by the exact opposite. My motto is “I still have time…” I don’t need to stress about the things I haven’t gotten to yet. There’s a time and place for everything. It will come. I will get to it…in due time.
The Little Boy and the Old Man
Said the little boy, “Sometimes I drop my spoon.”
Said the old man, “I do that too.”
The little boy whispered, “I wet my pants.”
I do that too,” laughed the little old man.
Said the little boy, “I often cry.”
The old man nodded, “So do I.”
But worst of all,” said the boy, “it seems
Grown-ups don’t pay attention to me.”
And he felt the warmth of a wrinkled old hand.
I know what you mean,” said the little old man.
— Shel Silverstein
Precious — I looked up the word precious in the dictionary. I bet you’ll find this in many of my writings. Being as well trilingual as slightly dyslectic means I’m constantly learning and forgetting :-) So I‘ve gotten into the habit of looking things up to become more succinct. Precious means “of great value because of being rare, expensive, or important.” Even though there are 7,8 billion people in this world, each and every life is precious. Even though there are 86,400 seconds in each day, every second is precious. Even though there are 30,000 days in an average lifetime, every day is precious. When I think of the word precious, I also think of fragile, and of love, and of something I want to put my arms around. In German, it translates to wertvoll or kostbar. Something we value. 2021 was another precious year. What made it precious? The people in my life, my flourishing shop, my new job, …, I could go on here for a while but perhaps what makes life most precious is death? It is the knowledge that all life is finite. Awareness of our mortality encourages us to savour the richness of the present moment. I believe after death there is something, and that something is just as precious. Therefore dying is not a scary thought to me. Even so, we are here now and I believe this must be seized. I have a daily alert on my phone. An appointment with myself. It has only three words in it. Aware, honest, and gentle. My way of reminding myself how I want to honour the preciousness of life. I found this precious quote and looking at it, I want to make doing more of that my goal for 2022 or really, for life:
This is how it works. I love the people in my life, and I do for my friends whatever they need me to do for them, again and again, as many times as is necessary. For example, in your case you always forgot who you are and how much you’re loved. So what I do for you as your friend is remind you who you are and tell you how much I love you. And this isn’t any kind of burden for me, because I love who you are very much. Every time I remind you, I get to remember with you, which is my pleasure.― James Lecesne
Quotes— Somewhat funny. I always write up the words of my reviews before I start typing in my thoughts. As you noticed I ended up adding a quote after every paragraph. This is the first year-in-review where I’ve done that. I did not plan to, it just happened. The reason for picking the word “Quotes” for 2021 is that every star I fold has a quote or a saying in it. I’m certainly not the only quote-lover. The internet is filled with pages and pages of quotes. My sister is getting bored by the repetitiveness and lack of originality but not me. I love things well said. Words well chosen. Quotes are like mini-stories. I believe strongly that the stories we tell ourselves day by day impact our lives.
There’s always a story. It’s all stories, really. The sun coming up every day is a story. Everything’s got a story in it. Change the story, change the world. ― Terry Pratchett
Rainbow — On my 46th Birthday, I went with my daughter, my mom, and Hazel for a walk along the sea. It was raining when we left, but when we arrived at the Lighthouse, the sun came out, and like a peacock showing its feathers, the horizon burst into colours and we gazed at a most gorgeous rainbow. It felt like nature giving me a birthday gift and it made me feel blessed and grateful.
Count your rainbows, not your thunderstorms. — Janice Thompson
Siblings— We don’t always agree on everything but we make for an absolutely amazing team. Year by year, I am eternally grateful for my mom giving birth to three children, and for my dad’s part in the game as well ;-)
Having a sister and a brother, both extraordinary in their very own way, enriches my life, perhaps more than they realize.
The power of a sibling who knows everything about you, who knows the family you grew up in, who carries half your genes — there’s nothing quite like that. — Jeffrey Kluger
Teardrop — Almost every morning, when I walk the dog, a teardrop runs down my left eye. It’s a peculiar thing, I have no idea why it happens. It is always the same eye and usually only one drop really. I’ve become used to it, I’d even say I’m looking forward to it. It is like a ritual that earthens me. It feels peaceful as if the entire “Weltschmerz” fits into a tiny teardrop, and when it is released, the world is still the same world but nevertheless a bit more …unruffled? I aim to take that calm soothing tranquility into the rest of my day and even when that does not always last the whole day, the next day, I go for a walk again and aim again.
Thirty spokes share the hub of a wheel;
yet it is its center that makes it useful.
You can mould clay into a vessel;
yet, it is its emptiness that makes it useful.
Cut doors and windows from the walls of a house;
but the ultimate use of the house
will depend on that part where nothing exists.Therefore, something is shaped into what is;
but its usefulness comes from what is not. ― Tao Te Ching
Umbrellas — During our vacation in Italy, as we walked through a small village with narrow streets, the roofs were all connected with strings with dozens of colourful umbrellas attached to them. It was not the first time, I’ve seen such an installation, but even so, it looked so cheerful, it reminded me things do not always have to be new and inventive. Some things are worthwhile just repeating because they’re popular for a reason.
I love everything that is upbeat, lively, cheerful, life-affirming. ― Marty Rubin
Vaccination— A topic I can’t pass by when thinking of the year 2021. Never before did I get four vaccinations in less than nine months time … three vaccinations against covid and the fourth one was a tetanus update. During our vacation in Italy, the Italians won the European Championships. We watched the game from the terrace of a small restaurant adjacent to the beach. When the penalty shootout started, for a moment I thought of walking back to our apartment with Hazel, our dog, that at that time had only been with us for a few months. Had I only followed that hunch. I stayed and when the Italians won the game, hell broke loose. Hundreds of people ran out onto the street, yelling, screaming, throwing firecrackers, it was nuts. It was a warm night so I was wearing a thin sleeveless dress. I had to carry Hazel, she would have gotten under the feet of all those people if I hadn’t. Her heart was pounding so fiercely, she was shivering all over. I tried to hold her tight to stop the squirming, her nails are quite sharp though. By the time we finally arrived in a calmer street, my arms and shoulders were covered with bloody scratches. Even though it’s something I surely do not want to repeat, it was a bonding experience. Seeing how much confidence Hazel has won since she’s with us is heartwarming. Being at the ocean helped to keep the scratches clean and luckily they healed well. Anyhow, that’s when I realized it is wise to keep one’s vaccinations up to date. They might be heavily discussed at the time but to me, they are a true blessing to mankind.
Trust your hunches. They’re usually based on facts filed away just below the conscious level. — Joyce Brothers
Wild animals— I read an article in the newspaper about how due to Corona the number of wild boars and rabbits that were hunted was significantly less than usual whereas more deer were shot, after all, to shoot a deer it needs only one hunter whereas hunting boars and rabbits, in general, happens in larger groups. It once again made me realise how each and every event affects our world in so many more ways than one thinks of. As I’m not a vegetarian, I try to at least be as considerate as possible when purchasing meat. It is important for the health of the forest that not all deer survive, and at the same time, the health of the forest is important for those deer that populate it. In the end, everything requires a certain balance even when the math is not quite that simple.
All things appear and disappear because of causes and conditions. Nothing ever exists entirely alone; everything is in relation to everything else. Wherever there is light, there is shadow; wherever there is length, there is shortness; wherever there is white, there is black. — Bukkyo Dendo Kyonkai
Xerox— ok I admit, the x remains problematic. I choose Xerox as in 2021 I purchased a new printer, not a xerox but an Epson eco tank. It is quite incredible how different two printers can be. I kept my HP Envy as I use both for different kinds of print jobs. On top, I now own a Cricut plotter. My office has really turned into a creative zone and I’m pretty excited about that.
You can’t use up creativity. The more you use, the more you have. — Maya Angelou
Year project— on the topic of creativity; Last year February I joined a creative year project, where all the participants paid a self-defined fee to join in. This fee would be returned if the participant managed to deliver on at least 30 of the 52 weekly projects. I signed up in an impulse something I surely do not regret. We all started off very strongly. Along the way we lost a few, it is interesting how hard it can be to get back on track after missing more than 2,3 weeks. They say “Don’t break the chain” and there is a lot to say for that. Consistency makes things easier. That said, I’m an even bigger believer in being gentle to oneself. And the gentle me says that everyone who journeyed along was part of something memorable. The project is almost over. I’m expecting an end spurt. I already did my 30 projects but there are still a few I’d love to finish. On top of which I’d like to capture all the finished projects in a single place. Ideally in an actual book rather than a blog. While writing these words, I smile. There are always so many things I’d like to do. But just like everyone else, my days only have 24 hours…sometimes I need to remind myself of that fact 😊-
We cannot do everything at once, but we can do something at once. — Calvin Coolidge
Zen— which brings me right to my last letter of this review. When I started folding paper stars, it was a zen activity. Crafting something with your hands can have a great calming effect. Especially the Zen Stars, which for instance say:
Do you have the patience to wait until your mud settles and the water is clear? — Lao Tzu
Don’t seek, don’t search, don’t ask, don’t knock, don’t demand — relax. — Osho
To live — is that not enough? — D.T. Suzuki
Then sales picked up further and further, and suddenly folding stars stopped being a zen activity. In October all the fortune star advent calendars were sold out already. I pulled my marketing budget, I raised my prices three times in a row…yet orders kept coming in. Luckily, I’m not the kind of person, who believes one must stem everything oneself. So I got help, tremendous help. Especially from my daughter, who now has a permanent job at tinylittlejoys. We’re a really good team. Together we’ll make sure to be better prepared for the next Christmas Season. Even though one can never really know what’s coming, and that’s quite ok — as whatever is coming — it’s in the stars 🌟☺️.
